Potential Humor From Those In The Know

The first half of our life is ruined by our parents and the second half by our children.
~Clarence Darrow

Kids. They're not easy. But there has to be some penalty for sex.
~Bill Maher

To be a successful father there's one absolute rule: when you have a kid, don't look at it for the first two years.
~Ernest Hemingway

The trouble with children is that they're not returnable.
~Quentin Crisp

There are only two things a child will share willingly -- communicable diseases and his mother's age.
~Benjamin Spock

I love children, especially when they cry, for then someone takes them away.
~Nancy Mitford

We spend the first twelve months of our children's lives teaching them to walk and talk and the next twelve telling them to sit down and shut up.
~Phyllis Diller


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