The Dalai Lama walks up to a hot dog vendor and says, "Make me one with everything." -- funnyr.com
Why do they bother saying "raw" sewage? Do some people cook that stuff? (George Carlin)
People in hell...where do they tell someone to go? (Red Skelton)
I didn't invent the hypothetical situation, but let's just suppose for a second that I did. (Auggie Cook)
I guess I just prefer to see the dark side of things. The glass is always half empty. And cracked. And I just cut my lip on it. And chipped a tooth. (Janeane Garofalo)
Barack Obama gave a speech in Germany and 200,000 people showed up. There were so many Germans shouting and screaming that France surrendered just in case.
According to rumors, John McCain and Barack Obama were trying to get Angelina Jolie’s endorsement for the campaign, and John Edwards was just trying to get her number.
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