* Adjust the tint on your TV so that all the people are green, and insist to others that you "like it that way."
* Drum on every available surface.
* Sing the Batman theme constantly.
* Staple papers in the middle of the page.
* Ask 1-800 operators for their home phone number. If they don’t give it to you ask why they are calling YOU at home.
* Sew department store anti-theft detector strips into people's backpacks.
* Write the surprise ending to a novel on its first page.
* Set alarms for random times.
* Honk and wave to strangers.
* Dress only in clothes colored Hunter's Orange.
* Change channels five minutes before the end of every show.
* Tape pieces of "Sweating to the Oldies" over climactic parts of rental movies.
* Decline to be seated at a restaurant, and simply eat their complementary mints by the cash register.
* ONLY TYPE IN UPPERCASE.
Audio Books Are The ONLY Way To Drive
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